Etiquette and North Carolina Funeral Homes

Losing a loved one can be a very emotional experience. Funeral homes across the country and in North Carolina have seen various levels of behavior of those trying to cope with loss. Sometimes, it’s hard to know what to say or do during this time. Saying that you’re sorry for a loss my sound cliché however, sometimes that is all one can do. There is such thing as etiquette when it comes to visiting North Carolina funeral homes and paying respects to a grieving family. We’ll go over some the appropriate and inappropriate ways to behave.

Typically, upon hearing of a loss, it is best to pay your respects by visiting the family. Depending on the family’s religion or past heritage, this could either take place in a funeral home setting, a home setting, or perhaps even a church. By physically being there for the family, it shows you are concerned with their well-being which can be a source of comfort to the grieving. North Carolina funeral homes offer large visitation rooms in which family and friends can congregate. Visits do not have to last a long time. Some people stay for 15-30 minutes. Others stay longer. Regardless of the length of the visit, it still says leaps and bounds to a family in mourning.

While visiting in funeral homes, churches or homes in North Carolina, it is best to be dressed in conservative, respectable clothing. This is another way to pay respects to a family. Bright colors and patterns are not appropriate in this situation. For men, a dark suit or dress pants with a collared shirt and tie are proper attire and for women, a dark dress or slacks are appropriate.

Upon visitation, proper etiquette is to view the deceased first to pay your respects, and then move toward the members of the family to offer your condolences. If you do not know some of the family members, it is appropriate to shake hands and introduce yourself to them. Perhaps a few words about how you knew the deceased or who you are there in support of is also proper etiquette. During this communication, it is best to talk in a quiet, low voice and avoid drawing attention to yourself.

Funeral homes and churches in North Carolina also receive flowers, cards, and gift baskets on behalf of the mourning family, and place them in the room where the viewing is taking place. Food baskets can be sent to either the funeral home or the home of the family. Food baskets can be very helpful during this time as well. It is not uncommon for food to be served in funeral homes themselves. Funeral homes typically always have kitchen area or room where there is a refrigerator and a sink.

It is not proper etiquette to help yourself to the food of the family, however is acceptable when you are invited to join in. It is also acceptable to bring a covered dish to a funeral home in North Carolina for the family during visitation hours. These dishes are usually things like casseroles or lasagnas, big enough to feel multiple people. This is not acceptable however on the day the actual service is taking place.

Funeral homes and churches found in North Carolina are typically where the funeral service takes place. When attending the actual service, the same dress code applies. When looking for a seat, proper etiquette is to leave the first three rows empty for family members. The service is usually conducted by a pastor, clergy or a funeral home director. It is not uncommon to sing a hymn or two, which can be favorites of the deceased, and it is also not uncommon to have family members or close friends go up and say a few words about the deceased. Sometimes, a recollected memory of the deceased is told in a story form. If there is something humorous about the memory, it is ok to laugh as a celebration of their life. It is also fine to shed tears or cry. This is a healthy act. If crying gets to the point where it is disruptive to others, it is best to excuse yourself to a private area.

After a service is over, it is best to head to your car. Many people proceed to the burial site. Funeral homes in North Carolina typically help direct traffic and provide a flag for vehicles to recognize that a funeral procession is taking place. Often during the procession, cars pull over and put their lights on out of respect of the procession. After the burial service has taken place, family members and friends sometimes take flowers that are placed around the burial site as memorabilia. It is not uncommon for families to then invite friends to join them at a home or church to have a luncheon or dinner. Funeral homes are no longer involved at this point; however, cater to meet the needs of families until then.

Remember, we are here to help you all day, every day with your funeral and cremation needs. We're open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. To contact us, simply call 1-877-989-9090. At any time of day or night, you will be able to speak with one of our trained, sympathetic and understanding representatives.